Oh how I love freshly washed linens.
Rattus will love coming home to
his own bed.
His fainting couch just needs some fluffing up
and he will just adore
this new English translation of Molière;
Rattus is not fluent in French like MOI.
I better get his cheese and crackers soup started
before he arrives - this will get him in a good mood.
I better tune my harp so I can butter him up with
the Smooth Tones of Tea Rat.
KNOCK KNOCK!
OH good heavens, he's here...
Entrez, s'il vous plaît!
Rattus:
Old man, the cottage looks splendid...what have you been up to?
Tea Rat:
Son, I've been preparing your homecoming. I have baked you
Rattus:
(He's up to something)
- Witsend hasn't been this clean in years.
Rattus:
WHAT IN BLOODY 'ELL
am I looking at?
Tea Rat:
Oh that...
I've have this goose for years and
I've have this goose for years and
Rattus:
Have you gone mad, sir? Another one of your animal rescues?
Tell me, who will pick up after her? You
Tell me, who will pick up after her? You
know how quickly food goes through a goose?
I absolutely refuse to share my home with
a goose - UNDERSTAND?
Rattus:
Hmmmm.....he did go to a lot of trouble getting my
smoking room in order...
Tea Rat old thing - you can keep the goose.
Tea Rat:
OH GOODY!
Can I keep the large white owl too, huh
Can I keep the large white owl too, huh
please, huh?
38 comments:
Oh adorable Tea Rat, you conniving charmer, I can learn a thing or two from you! Fainting couch, tea and pudding, soup all to the soothing heavenly sound of playing your harp! Smoking room sealed the deal. Oh Rattus you kind sweet one to allow a fairytale goose and snow owl into your home.
I enjoyed coming into your home to be part of such a sweet planned out and loving home warming.
Anita the production is brilliantly executed and oh Penny such magic you create.
XOXO,
Vera
PS Hey Rattus, spoiled man you get to do the dishes.
Oh Rattus I'm sorry, welcome back home!
Vera
OMG! This is the best ever...Anita, your photos are beyond funny! HAAAAAAHAAAAHAAAAAA
I LOVE IT!!!
I see you are collecting miniature furniture? EXQUISITE pieces.. I LOVE the fainting couch, and we know they need that, teeheee.
The orange cake and pie in the cabinet.. Are those the ones I made years ago? They look familiar.
Well, this is just like reading a little book!
Merci dear one, for all the inspiration and FUN!
I MUST send Bebe over.
Love you!
Penny
VERA! Madame, Tea Rat here...thank you, kind lady, for entering into Witsend, where there is always a surprise under the couch pillows, dust bunnies in the corner, and a new pet in the garden..Rattus just doesn't always notice them..teeeheee
Rattus: OH YES I DO, TEA RAT!
Tea Rat: I think we need to admit you back into hospital, old man. I'm ringing up Dr. White to tell her about your memory loss and delusional behavior; we can't have that!
Bebe here...
WELCOME HOME RATTUS... I am so glad you have had a speedy recovery! Ms Tinkle and Mr. Wizzer? HAAAAHAAAA, you crack me up!
Tea Rat, I think maybe Rattus needs some Ginkgo TEA for his memory, no?
If I come for a visit, may I sleep on this beautiful fainting couch?
love, Bebe
Rattus: I really appreciate the warm home-coming from hospital. I really do. But I did not expect to find in my cottage a goose the size of an elephant.
Tea Rat: And an owl.
Rattus: Yes, we'll deal with him later. You say you've had this goose for years. She's as big as a house.
Goose: HONK...HONK!
Rattus: You keep out of this. Now back to you. Where pray tell have you been hiding this enormous creature?
Goose: HONK!
Rattus: Quiet!
Goose: honk.
Tea Rat: What do you mean? She's been right here all along, right here, at Witsend, in this very cottage. Like I said, I've had her for years.
Rattus: I had double arm surgery not a lobotomy. Who do you think you're kidding here?
Tea Rat: Oh dear. Your condition is worse than we thought. Don't you remember anything?
Rattus: What do you mean?
Tea Rat: I mean that the trauma of surgery may have caused you to lose some of your memory. This goose is your favorite pet, and so is this owl. Oh dear, it's tragic when one can't remember the ones they love. Loss of memory. They call it the long goodbye.
Rattus: Oh yeah? Then what are their names? QUICK!
Tea Rat: Uh...names? I mean...names, yes, oh that...
Rattus: You don't know, do you? Hah!
Tea Rat: Of course I do. This goose here is ah... I mean her name is, ah... Goose. Her name is Goose. Yeah, that's it.
Goose: HONK! HONK!
Rattus: QUIET!
Goose: honk.
Rattus: And the owl?
Tea Rat: His name is...uh....uh, why, Owl, of course.
Owl: SCREEECH....SCREEECH!
Goose: HONK...HONK...HONK!
Rattus: QUIEEET! Crikey what a racket. And I suppose you've had the owl for years too?
Tea Rat: Oh years and years and years. Ever so many. Too many to count. Oh, it's so sad you don't remember them. They've been our pets for decades and decades, eons, millennia. And you don't remember. You poor bugger.
Rattus: Ah hah! I've got you. They can't have been our pets because you only just moved into Witsend Cottage four years ago, whereas you say we have had them for decades, eons...
Tea Rat: Oh dear, oh dear. You poor rat. You poor mixed up rat. Don't you remember. When I moved in, they were already here. They were YOUR pets originally, and you've had them forever and ever.
Rattus: Oh. Yeah. Sure. I think I remember now.
Tea Rat: You do? ..... I mean, you do! Sure. Good.
Rattus: Sure I do. I remember when I first got them I named the goose, Ms Tinkle, and the owl, Mr Wizzer. And it was you that named them Goose and Owl, over my strenuous objections. I remember it all now.
Tea Rat: Huh? Really? I mean yeah. Sure.
Rattus: Ah hah! I JUST MADE ALL THAT UP to prove you're trying to fool me.
Tea Rat: Oh dear, oh dear. Now you're making things up. You poor rat. You poor deluded rat.
Goose: HONK! HONK!
Owl: SCREEEECH!
Tea Rat: Dr. White, hello....yes, Tea Rat here, uh, I mean, NURSE TEARATchet. Rattus is completely unwell and I believe you need to run a battery of tests on his psychological status. He is making things up!
Dr. White here... You rang Tea Rat?
I agree with Bebe's suggestion.. Ginkgo Tea should do the trick, BUT.... If this does not correct the memory, we may need to go in... Yes, the brain..
Tea Rat: BEBE MY DEAR SISTER! Yes, of course, you are most welcomed to come for a visit! Uncle Rattus (yes, old man, you are her UNCLE, not her suitor!) says you can have his fainting couch for the entire time you stay with us.
RATTUS: WHAT? Who are these chaps in white coming to our door?
Rattus: Nobody's going in anywhere.
Goose: HONK! HONK!
Rattus: QUIET!
Goose: honk
Tea Rat: Oh Dr.....I am so relieved to see you here! I agree that Ginko tea will do a splendid job of calming Rattus down before you GO IN....I completely sign off your plan and
Rattus: ENOUGH OF THIS! Wait, where are you chaps in white taking me?
Rattus: Tea Rat does NOT have the authority to sign off on anything! The bloak is a Th.D, not an R.N.! His skills are limited to buying and selling teas, growing his own blends and prescribing tisanes for home remedy use only! Someone help me!
Tea Rat: teeheee
Dr. White here.
Now don't be afraid Rattus, we are just going to take a little trip to the hospital...
Tea Rat, please gather Rattus's things, I will let the men in the white coats in.
Rattus: ENOUGH OF THIS! Wait, where are you chaps in white taking me? What's that big knife in your hand?
Tea Rat: So sad? We'll have to go in. Dr White, Nurse bebe, bring the straps, and plenty of gauze to soak up the blood. Let's just we're not too late.
Rattus: Sweet Saint Rodentia. You're all mad.
Bebe: Ready Dr White. Here's the saw.
Tea Rat: and the Ax? Did you bring the big.
Rattus: Stop. Stop. I remember it all now. Hello there Ms Tinkle and Mr Wizzer. So good to see you again.
Tea Rat: You mean Goose and Owl, don't you. You're memory stills seems fuzzy. I think we need to go in. JACK-HAMMER.
Rattus: Of course, Goose and Owl. No need for surgery. I'm well see?
Tea Rat: Are you sure?
Goose: HONK.
Owl: SCREEECH.
Rattus: Damn straight!
Tea Rat: Excellent decision, Dr. White.
Rattus: Wait a bloody minute...I am perfectly fine!
Tea Rat: You heard Dr. White, now gather your valise!
Dr. White here...Put the saw down nurse Bebe.. Did you hear me say SAW??? Maybe YOU need to be checked out... I think his memory is coming back.. Let us give him awhile to collect his thoughts.
Tea Rat: Wait....no, this is wrong...stop the procedure! So then old man, you are telling me that you DO remember the goose and the owl from WAAAAAAAY back?
Rattus: YES MA'AM, I mean, SIR! (you look ridiculous in that nurse outfit, son)
Tea Rat: Well then, Dr. White, I don't think we'll need your services. Bebe, put the gauze away, put the jackhammer back in the shed and all will be well at Witsend. What do you expect? It's where you reach the end of your wits!!!
Rattus: So we're all good here? No brain surgery?
Tea Rat: Can I keep Goose and Owl?
Goose: HONK
Owl: SCREEECH
Rattus: Damn straight!
Tea Rat: Ahhhh.....someone, pickle my brain when I pass...I'm genius.teeeheee
Rattus: Humpf! Mumble...mumble...I know...mumble ...I'm not...mumble...nuts.
Tea Rat: What was that?
Rattus: I said I'm such a putz!
Goose: HONK! HONK!
Rattus: Who asked you?
Tea Rat: Hey Motha Goose, hey....come 'ere....we nabbed him. He's in...you can stay!!!!!!!!
Rattus: What was that? What did I just here you say?
Dr. White here.
I am happy to hear that all is well. Do you see what happens when we all put our brains together? Even Mother Goose and owl are ok.
I must run.. I have a major surgery in an hour on a very unhappy elephant.. Bebe will be assisting me.
Sincerely,
Dr. White
p.s.
I will stop in at the Hollow and see if Dimity Doormouse can also come along with me..
Tea Rat! Oh Dr. White! Thank you Dr., for assisting us today and being on-call with your expertise! Elephant you say? Major surgery? Bebe is an outstanding assistant and I vouch for her all the way and
Rattus: DO NOT listen to him, Dr. White. You are best getting Dimity Doormouse with her tiny little hands than having a fraud of a nurse....TeaRatchet my.....teehee
Goose: HONK!
Rattus: Yer dern tootin'
Tea Rat: I love my goose. Thank you, Rattus. Did you enjoy getting your chain yanked today - your cage rattled? teehee
Too Much!!!!!
I fell of my chair laughing, and I must have hit my head because I see it snowing outside, for the 2nd time today! I must be imagining it because we had 60 degree weather 2 days ago. Don't send the Dr. over
though, I am sure some hot soup and a bit of rest will be just the ticket.
Your photos, Penny's creations, your accessories, your story,
what an enjoyable visit I've had!
~ Violet
Oh the creativity ~ clapping wildly I am like a schoolgirl full of glee !!!
I love the way you photographed them Anita it was so expressive ~ as well as the very, very cute story line.
Of course Penny's creations just as delightful .
What fun !
~ xox Willow
LOL! I need a good giggle after spending 10 hours at the garden show today ( and yesterday and the day before) Ye gads! Those ratty guys are living in a surprisingly classy pad, who woulda thunk? Especially tea rat in those funky lil green boots! Love it.
PS> If they can't keep the goosey, sent her down here to the Hollow, we have lots of room and don't mind a little more goose poop.
Ths is it!!!! Just one more step and you will be IN MOTION, my friends!! MAGIC, hilarious, adorable, charming, brilliant......
Words cannot express! Love this and you so very much!
BRAVO to all of the creative geniuses whose talents are featured here!!!
WOOHOO!!!!
:)))
xoxoxoxo
Wow - if I just could be Rattus and enjoy that plush pad with the tea - for sure the Goose and Owl would certainly not be a bother. Loved those beautiful green slippers. Thank you so much dear for making me smile today.
Oooo>>I'M late...I was out celebrating my daughters B-Day..we have three B-days in three weeks!!!
But really...coming home to this was also a feast!!!The two of you are getting better and better..This should go worldwide on the web..and the goose too.!!
and I am so proud and full of admiration..I would like to declare Nowhere officially to be The Rats of Nowhere land..because look where they are now!!
Chapeau my sweet friends..Penny and Nita..I salute you!!
Tea Rat: MISS M.! You were out celebrating? Well, I have the perfect little birthday cake for you and your loved ones...it is just the right size for mice. I shall post my newest creation from my kitchen, for now I have taken up cake making.
Rattus: Yes Miss M., Tea Rat is a grand patîssier, creating paper cakes!
Tea Rat: Thank you dearest Dutchess for coming! The fun is always complete when you arrive!
Oh my goodness! It's been way too long since I've visited over here at Nowhere! This is amazing! Love the photography, Anita! And Penny's felted creations are full of so much character. Watch out for those geese. As Maximus would say when it comes to that sort of thing, "P-U! It's kind of stinky in here!" hahahaha...
Hello Dear Ruttus I’m pleased you are feeling better. I’m glad I found the link to Nowhere as I so enjoy reading about you.
Thank you for coming to visit me today Anita, I’m so pleased you liked my mouse tale or should that be tail! :)
How I love the continuing saga of Rattus (welcome home, Rattus!) and his gang! Clever, adorable, imaginative. How perfect in every way!
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