One wants to wander away from the world’s some-wheres..
....................into our own nowhere.”

Saturday, June 12, 2010

California Here We Come.

Words by Ruben Rivera. Pictures by Anita Rivera.
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Rattus: I say my good rat, are we really leaving our beloved land of Nowhere for...what did you call it?...Cauliflower, in America?

Tea Rat: Really my dear fellow, you must get into the spirit of the thing. "When in Rome," and all that, you know. We want to blend in, be part of "what's happen'in," be cool, hip.


Rattus: OK, so how do YOU pronounce it?

Tea Rat: Ca-li-for-ni-a.

Rattus: Ca-li-for-NEE-a.

Tea Rat: You da bomb!

Rattus: I beg your pardon? I am what?

Tea Rat: The BOMB! You know, good, amazing, awesome, the best. Gotta know the language of the natives or you're going to stick out like a sore thumb.


Rattus: Maybe we should tell our friends we will be away in Ca-li-for-NEE-a.



Tea Rat: That's what we're doing here.

Rattus: OK. I'll go.

Tea Rat: You bad.

Rattus: What did I do wrong? I try my best to be a good, upstanding rat.

Tea Rat: No, not bad. BAD! You know, good, amazing, awesome, the best.

Rattus: I thought that's what "da Bomb" meant?

Tea Rat: Are you going to be difficult? I'm trying to save your life here. In California you must be IN or you will be chewed up and spit OUT. We have to talk like them, look like them, dress like them, eat like them.

Rattus: Eat like them? What do they eat out in CaliforNEEa?

Tea Rat: Well, I hear the well-to-do eat so-called "health food" like mashed yeast and alfalfa sprouts, and fruit smoothies fortified with vitamins.

Rattus: Sounds like I need to pack my own food.

Tea Rat: You'll do no such thing. You're going to do what?

Rattus: I know. I know. I'm going to blend in. Be "da bomb" and be "bad."

Tea Rat: Now you chill'in.

Rattus: I'm what?

Tea Rat: Chill'in. You know, good, amazing, awesome, the best.

Rattus: This CaliforNEEa sounds like a strange place. But at least the language will be easy to acquire. Every word means the same thing.

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So long to our dear friends from Nowhere and Wits End. We'll be back soon.

Tea Rat & Rattus Scribus.

11 comments:

Angelsdoor * Penny said...

I don't know when I have laughed so hard! You two just crack me up.. Yipeeeeee, California here you come... Love your outfits.. Yes, you need to bring swim wear..
Ruben, this was such a HOOT!! Great story... Anita, your drawings are over the TOP!! Bebe is so excited that you are coming to
Ca-li-for-Nee-a......
Penny and Bebe

Rattus Scribus said...

Dear Penny and Bebe,
We're so glad you both enjoyed the humor of these two eccentric rats. Sometimes they're just in another world, and that suits us fine, cause they make us laugh too. We are so excited to meet you when we're in CaliforNEEa.
Love,
Ruben, Anita, Rattus & Tea Rat

Rattus Scribus said...

Here, here!! I am dreaming about Rutabagorz, Penney and much fun! Anita

Patricia Cabrera said...

Oh you guys .. you gonna have so much fun!!! What a treat!! *grin*
I will miss you but I know that it will be for a sort time...Nowhere will never be the same without you...

Angelsdoor * Penny said...

I am beyond excited to meet you both! Bebe is on pins and needles. Hope to see you in CaliforNEEa !
Love, Penny, Bebe and lets not forget Mr. Jasper.

The Dutchess said...

Dear Rats...I will be thinking of you..Have a wonderful time..Miss Moussie would like to go with you but I told her maybe next time..or maybe we will meet you one day in OUR garden..Take care..stay warm and stay happy..Hugs from all of us:))

The Dutchess said...

Dear Anita..your drawings are getting better and better..you are
chill'in big time..your da bomb..I see these two rats surfin in my living room..SO MUCH FUN..:))

The Dutchess said...

Ruben..old chap..Its such fun to read your writings..already looking forward to the next witty post.:)
Have a wonderful time in the sunshine..BE COOL!

Castles Crowns and Cottages said...

YEAH!!! Oh, dearest, I was meaning to ask you for the code again to enter into the playlist! You read my mind across the Atlantic....O.K. we are really joined at the hip!!! YOU DA BOMB! Anita

Jackie said...

Oh for Pete's sake...rat-a-tat-tat you rats are the best! I laughed so hard I woke up my snoring husband...I think he was dreaming of California girls or perhaps Rats Go To Hollywood...

You two remind me of the dish that ran away with the spoon. You serve up such a delightful mix of laughter, sunshine...healthy food indeed. Gets right down in the belly and makes for a good belly laugh!

You should market that drawing for Gold's California Gym where Rats have more fun!

Have a blast, from your past. Give Penny a kiss from Gretta.

Debbie said...

OMG you guys are incredible! YOU MUST MUST MUST write a children's book together. Anita, your drawings are fantastic. The whole time I was reading I had a smile on my face. Seriously. I cannot wait to see you guys. I will definitely be attending the breakfast at Rusty's house and I really hope my hubby can come along. He's on vacation that week and has been DYING to do some water skiing ... but even if he can't make it, I will definitely be there! Can't Wait!

XOXO
Debbie