Rattus: Tea Rat, what are you doing?
Tea Rat: I'm writing my obituary. I was reading the newspaper obituaries and they're not very exciting. No plot. No foreshadowing. No hero's quest. No rising action, climax, or falling action, no conflict or resolution. When I die, I want to make sure the newspapers get my obituary right.
Rattus: You just mentioned parts of fictional literature. An obituary is a simple public notice of someone's death with a few factual highlights of their life.
Tea Rat: It doesn't have to be boring does it? It's not enough that I'll be dead, the summation of my life has to be dead too? We want meaning, drama, characters that a reader cares about, irony, literary panache. The reader should be in tears when they're done, emotionally spent, unable to take any more.
Reepicheep, Chronicles of Narnia: Voyage of the Dawntreader
Rattus: Alright. Let's hear the obituary you have created for yourself.
Tea Rat: "He was a good rat."
Rattus: That's it?
Tea Rat: What do you think? Why, Rattus, you're crying.
Rattus: I'm emotionally spent.
Tea Rat: Well, whaddaya know. It worked.
Rattus: Please stop. I can't take any more."Blessed are the cheese-makers."